Tuesday, September 18, 2018

What's in your suitcase?

I just finished watching a TED Talk on celebrating introverts and what they bring to the table both in our personal life but also in our school life.  It was refreshing to hear that introverts should be celebrated because I have for 58 years tried to push myself to not be as introverted as I am.  I will be honest, I don't particularly care for social gatherings that require me to talk to everyone and be happy and full of great information to share....So, you may be wondering why are you a principal?  Lord only knows why I have been put in this position, but I do the best I can!  I will also be honest and say that I have grown to love being a principal and pushing myself in ways that I would have never done if I stayed in the classroom.  I feel as a principal I can offer teachers something that an extroverted leader may not be able to offer.  I listen and I listen well!  I have found that most extroverted people listen but they do not listen well.  Now, they will say they are listening, but if you are an introvert you can tell they are not!  I notice all body language, cadence in the voice, changes in speech patterns to denote that you are thinking about something else while you are trying to listen to me!  As a leader listening without putting your "spin" on what someone is saying is how you can grow people to want to step out and take a chance...that their idea is worthwhile and it is their idea and NOT the extroverts spin on their idea!  Does that make sense?  I love extroverts, don't get me wrong!  They are some of my best friends and my husband is one and I love him dearly.  But, in saying that, I think as a society we tend to push those that are quiet and introverted to be like their extroverted friends and when we do this we miss out on some of the most talented and creative souls that have so much to offer but may not step out and do so when always pushed to be someone they are not.

At school last year,  we talked about storytelling...telling our own stories which are so important as we build relationships with our students.  In looking for something on this subject, I ran across a TED talk about introverts and it fit so well into why we need to tell our stories that I thought I would share.  At the beginning of the TED Talk, Susan Cain talked about what was in her suitcase as she was going to camp for the summer.  Her suitcase was full of books which are her passion.  At the end of her talk, she asked that we take a moment to examine what we have in our suitcase and take it out every once in a while and share with others because we all have so much to share.  So I started thinking about what would be in my suitcase?  My suitcase would be filled with fabric, quilting magazines, sewing instruments, books on creating things, mystery books, magazines like PEOPLE  (I do love gossip stories), my kindle, stationary, lots of pens, markers, pencils, my calendar (knockoff Erin Condren) with all the trappings for marking up my calendar, essential oils, pictures of my kids and family, and my dogs if they would fit in the suitcase!  My husband said he would bring the following in his suitcase; me, kindle, his favorite pair of shoes, guitar to play, firewood and essentials to make a fire, bourbon, and cigars!  Oh,  how we are different!  In fact, he looked at me like I had two heads when I asked him what he would put in his suitcase which is exactly what I expected.  The funny thing is that my husband who is an extrovert freely shares and talks about what is in his suitcase and all of what he said fits him and what he shows the world.  On the other hand, many people know I love quilting, sewing, and reading but I do not share my work but on rare occasions and it is something that I love doing but never really have the time to devote to on a regular basis!

It was refreshing to hear what Susan Cain felt was important about those of us who function as introverts and that in the school we are always pushing our kids to work in groups, which is fine, but we should also celebrate working alone and thinking deeply which cannot be done when you have five or six kids all talking at once! I think balance is the key to helping our introverted children.  They need to be pushed, but at the same time, they need to have quiet time as do our extroverted kids so that they can learn to think through things, build up their perseverance, and learn to follow through with everything that is asked of them in the classroom.

Her TED talk is excellent if you would like to take a moment to watch it!